I Learned to Discern the Work of Satan II

At dawn of the next day, I heard some knocks at the gate, so I hurried to rise and open the gate, only to see Sister Yang and Sister Zheng with their hair and eyebrows covered with white frost. They were very excited at seeing me. Sister Yang said, “Oh, brother, we finally see you. Where were you the previous two nights? We waited long but didn’t meet you.” I was deeply moved, saying, “Sisters, it’s cold outside. Hurry in.” They entered the room and sat down, and I gave each of them a cup of hot water. Then I was open with them, “Sisters, these days I actually kept avoiding you. I’m so sorry. After you left that day, I began to read Almighty God’s words. But I just felt sleepy and got a headache soon afterward. I didn’t understand what all that was about, so I didn’t want to read the words of Almighty God anymore and deliberately hid from you. Last night, I was in and I heard all that you said. Your love moved me and left me condemned, and I felt I couldn’t avoid you anymore. Today I’d like to figure out the problem. If I miss the return of the Lord Jesus, I’ll regret for the rest of my life. Now that you’re here, could you please fellowship with me about that problem?”

In reply, Sister Yang said, “Brother, the question you ask is crucial. Many people have been troubled in varying degrees when they first believe in God, which concerns the battle in the spiritual realm. In the last days, Almighty God brings us the everlasting way of life while Satan fears most that we may gain eternal life after accepting Almighty God’s work. So, Satan finds ways to interfere with us and make us doubt, fear and even deny God’s work. Only when we are capable of discerning Satan’s work and see through its schemes can we better read God’s words and follow His work. Then how does Satan disturb God’s work? Let’s look at what Almighty God says about it. The word of Almighty God says, ‘What work comes from Satan? In the work that comes from Satan, the visions in people are vague and abstract, and they are without normal humanity, the motivations behind their actions are wrong, and although they wish to love God, there are always accusations within them, and these accusations and thoughts are always interfering within them, constraining the growth of their life, and stopping them from having normal circumstances before God. Which is to say, as soon as there is the work of Satan within people, their hearts can’t be at peace before God, they don’t know what to do with themselves, the sight of an assembly makes them want to run away, and they are unable to close their eyes when others pray. The work of evil spirits wrecks the normal relationship between man and God, and upsets people’s previous visions and the path that their life has entered upon, in their hearts they can never draw close to God, things always happen that cause disruption to them and enshackle them, and their hearts cannot find peace, leaving no strength to their love of God, and making their spirits sink downward. Such are the manifestations of the work of Satan. The work of Satan is manifested in the following: being unable to stand your ground and stand witness, causing you to become someone who is at fault before God, and who has no faithfulness toward God. … it causes God’s touch to disappear within you, and makes you complain about God and oppose Him, leading you to question God, and there is even the risk of you leaving God. All this is of the work of Satan’ (“The Work of the Holy Spirit and the Work of Satan” in The Word Appears in the Flesh). ‘That which comes from Satan makes your visions disappear, it strips you of all that you used to have, it causes you to stray far from God, it takes away the love between you and your brothers and sisters, breeds in you a heart of hate, gives you nowhere to go, makes you unwilling to lead the life of the church, and leaves you without love of God in your heart. This is the result of the work of Satan and evil spirits’ (“The Twenty-second Utterance” in The Word Appears in the Flesh).”

Having read those words from Almighty God, Sister Yang continued with her fellowship, “God’s words have well explained our problem. All people, matters, and things that stop man from quieting their hearts before God come from the work of Satan. Satan uses certain methods in its work to disturb man so they become upset and can never quiet their hearts before God. For example, people have headaches, feel drowsy, and even nod off while reading God’s words, and then they will have no mind to continue. This is the disturbance of Satan. Satan just uses these methods to make man give up reading Almighty God’s words and leave His care and protection, to prevent them from accepting the true way and thus lose God’s salvation. This is the evil intention of Satan disturbing God’s work and hindering man from investigating the true way. If we want to break free from Satan’s disturbance and temptation, we should have discernment and penetrate its tricks, and come before God to pray, ‘Oh God! I know it’s Satan interfering with the relationship between You and me. Now, I can’t be restrained by it. I should stand my ground. Oh God, I beg You to give me faith and perseverance to overcome Satan’s temptation, to protect my heart, and to allow my heart to be at peace before You.’ When we cooperate with God by praying many times, God will see our heart and then help us overcome Satan’s temptation and disturbance, and in the end, Satan will draw back.”

Then Sister Zheng said, “I’ll share my own experience. I remember when I first accepted God’s work in the last days, I found God’s words are very good and practical and felt like reading them carefully. However, when I read God’s words, my waist hurt and my eyelids began to droop. But once I stopped reading God’s words, those problems just disappeared. At that time, I also doubted God’s work and didn’t read God’s words anymore. In the next meeting, when a sister asked me what I had entered into and what I had gained from reading God’s words, I answered that I didn’t read God’s words because once I read them, my waist would hurt and I would feel drowsy. Then the sister fellowshiped with me that I should have discernment about Satan’s work. Satan just takes advantage of the weakness of our flesh, like illness, headaches, and sleepiness, to interfere with us, cause us to doubt God’s work and word until we betray God in the end. So, when I was disturbed by Satan again, I immediately came before God to pray, consciously cooperated with Him to forsake the flesh, and also asked Him to give me faith and strength so as not to be constrained by the flesh. From then on, I’m no longer troubled while reading God’s words and my heart can also be at peace before God.”

After hearing the two sisters’ fellowship, I said, “Oh, so that explains it. No wonder I dozed off while reading God’s words that day after you left. Today, through your fellowship, I come to understand that Satan was unwilling to see me keep up with God’s work in the last days, meet the Lord’s return, and attain God’s salvation, so it worked behind the scenes. All this turns out to be Satan’s schemes. I didn’t understand the truth in this regard, had no discernment, and rose to Satan’s hook. I nearly betrayed God! Thanks be to God! Today you have cleared up my confusion, and I will no longer be restricted by this. I will read God’s words, pray to God more often about this, and learn to see through Satan’s tricks. I believe God will surely guide me.”

Sister Yang said happily, “Praise God! This is the result achieved by the work of the Holy Spirit. As long as we practically cooperate with God and forsake Satan, we will receive God’s enlightenment and guidance.”

Later, when I read God’s words, I sometimes was still sleepy and could not absorb them, and became upset. Then I knelt down and prayed to God, “Oh God! I know Satan tries to stop me from reading Your words, and it also hinders me from drawing near to You. I don’t want to be restricted by it, and I’m willing to forsake it. I beg You to give me faith and strength so I can overcome its disturbance and concentrate on reading Your words. Amen!” After the prayer, I did not feel that sleepy when reading God’s words and listening to the hymns. Through some time of my practical cooperation with God, I could be at peace before God to read His words and was willing to attend meetings. In the meetings, I read and fellowshiped about God’s words with my brothers and sisters, and understood the truth expressed by God more and more clearly, living freely and unrestrained amidst God’s love.

After a while, I began to cooperate in spreading the gospel, and at last brought the brothers and sisters of my former denomination who truly believed in the Lord with good humanity to God’s family. All the glory goes to God!

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I Learned to Discern the Work of Satan I

Meng Liang

One day, Sister Yang and Sister Zheng from the Church of Almighty God came to preach to me Almighty God’s work of the last days. Sister Yang said, “Almighty God carries out His work through expressing the word of judgment, which just fulfills the prophecy of the Lord Jesus, ‘However, when he, the Spirit of truth, is come, he will guide you into all truth: for he shall not speak of himself; but whatever he shall hear, that shall he speak: and he will show you things to come’ (John 16:13). This prophecy has been fulfilled by Almighty God expressing His word, which is the utterance of the Holy Spirit. Almighty God and the Lord Jesus are both the incarnation of God’s Spirit. Almighty God is exactly the returned Lord Jesus….” Hearing Sister Yang’s fellowship, I felt so happy. What a good fortune to be able to meet the Lord’s return! So, I made up my mind to read Almighty God’s words carefully and investigate this way closely.

Then Sister Zheng said, “Brother, we’ve known that God has expressed new words and done new work. We’ll understand more of the truth when we read God’s words more. If you have any confusion, you may pray to God and seek first, and we can fellowship together in the next meeting. After we have understood God’s will, we can preach the gospel to other brothers and sister in religion so that they will receive God’s salvation in the last days.” I replied in agreement, “Okay. Thanks be to the Lord! I feel so good to read God’s words and meet the Lord’s return. I will read seriously The Word Appears in the Flesh. If there are things I don’t understand, I’ll pray for God to enlighten me to understand His words.” “Great! Praise God!” said Sister Zheng.

After they left, I thought: The Word Appears in the Flesh is the personal utterance of God. I must read it carefully. However, I had trouble keeping my eyes open and even nodded off shortly after I started reading it. I thought to myself: What’s going on? Why am I so sleepy? I might as well stand up. But when I stood up to read, I was even more sleepy and had a headache. I massaged my temples, wondering how I became like this suddenly. With no heart to read Almighty God’s words anymore, I climbed into bed to take a rest. Yet I had not expected that as soon as I lay down, my headache was gone and I was wide awake. I thought: How did this happen? I could not figure it out anyway and did not feel like meeting with the two sisters from the Church of Almighty God.

The next afternoon when the sun was setting, I was at home and wondered where I should go since the two sisters would come soon. After thinking hard for some time, I decided to go to the home of a co-worker of my denomination.

It was over ten o’clock at night when I returned home. My neighbor asked, “Where were you, Mr. Meng? Two young women waited at your gate for a long time, and they have just left.” I knew they must be Sister Yang and Sister Zheng, and my heart was strongly condemned. I thought: It’s so cold. I made a date with them, but actually hid myself away and kept them waiting so long. Am I not to blame? But at the thought of my sleepiness and headaches upon reading the words of Almighty God, my guilt disappeared somewhat, and still I did not want to see them again. The following evening, I thought: The two sisters waited in vain yesterday. Will they still come this evening? What should I do if they come? To meet them or not? If I do, they will fellowship with me about the words of Almighty God, but I will doze off once I read those words. If I don’t, however, they will keep waiting outside, suffering from the cold. I just can’t stand to see that. After a fierce struggle, I recalled that I had vowed to repay the Lord’s great love for it was the Lord Jesus who had cured my cancer after I believed in Him. Faced with Almighty God’s work of the last days, I must be cautious in case I take the wrong way and thus be unworthy of the Lord’s grace. No, I had to avoid them, but I had nowhere else to go. At last I decided to stay at home. I said to my neighbor, “Auntie, today I feel uncomfortable, and I want to have a rest at home without being bothered. Would you mind locking my gate from the outside?”

My neighbor agreed to my request. Soon after, I heard the voices of Sister Yang and Sister Zheng coming from outside the gate. Sister Zheng said, “This brother isn’t in again. Where could he have gone?” Sister Yang said, “Yeah, where has he possibly gone? Today’s environment is set up for us by God, and He is simply testing our faith in Him. Wherever the brother goes, we should wait for him. Let’s pray to God and rely on Him.” Hearing what they said, I felt awful and shifted nervously in the room. It’s freezing cold outside. They come here for me. I have kept them waiting so long last night, yet I’m doing this again. I feel so much sorry for them. They waited at the gate for several hours, and I could hear them pacing up and down due to the cold. At around 9 P.M., I heard Sister Yang say, “We’ve waited for a long time, but the brother has not come back. There is God’s goodwill. God arranged this environment to make perfect our faith. Today we fail to wait until the brother returns, but we can come tomorrow and keep waiting until we meet him. We believe in God’s sovereignty and arrangement, and hope God can lead us. We can pray for God to move the brother’s heart.”

After they went away, I lay awake tossing and turning, feeling very upset: Am I still a believer in God? I broke my word and the two sisters froze for me again and again. What were they doing this for? Were they not trying to fellowship about the truth of the Lord’s coming for me to understand? They didn’t meet me twice, but they will still come and wait until they have met me. What’s more, they pray for me. They just wish to soon give me a firmer belief of Almighty God’s work in the last days. It would seem that people of the Church of Almighty God have genuine love. When my thoughts went there, I could not help but hate myself for shutting them out so inhumanely. I can’t go on like this. I must wait for them at home and figure out why I got a headache and dozed off while reading Almighty God’s words.

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Breaking Out of the Cocoon II

Unexpectedly, my husband found that I went to the meetings of the Church of Almighty God, and he told it to my father. One evening, when I was upstairs, I suddenly heard noises down in the yard. I opened the curtains and looked out, only to find that my father had burst into the yard angrily with four or five co-workers in his church, the sight of which brought me out in a cold sweat. My heart thudded, and I immediately knelt down on the floor and cried out to God for help, “O Almighty God! My father comes again to disturb me with some people in religion. I am timid and afraid. O God! You know I am of little stature. May You give me faith and courage….” Then God’s words suddenly occurred to me: “You should have My courage within you. Hold to the principles before your unbelieving relatives as well. But for My sake you should not yield to any force of darkness. Walk in the perfect way by My wisdom. Don’t let Satan’s schemes succeed. Lay your heart before Me as best you can, and I will comfort you and fill your heart with peace and joy” (“The Tenth Utterance” in The Word Appears in the Flesh). God’s words gave me strength. As I had God’s words in my heart, I was no longer timid and fearful. I thought, “No matter how they disturb me, I will never again let myself be fooled by Satan and deceived by them. It is heaven’s law and earth’s principle for me to believe in and follow God; no one has the right to interfere in it, not even my most loved ones.” So, I went downstairs composedly and greeted them. They all started speaking. A co-worker, looking with wonder at me, said, “Fangfang, I never expected that an intelligent person like you would believe in the Eastern Lightning. It is a false way! You’d better repent before the Lord Jesus….” I said with calmness, “You have never listened to the messages of the Eastern Lightning, nor have you ever read the words of Almighty God; how can you say that the way I put my faith in is a false way?” She said, “We don’t dare to read that book. It is terribly fascinating. If anyone reads it, he will be fascinated by it.” I said, “The words of Almighty God can convince people because they are God’s words and are the truth. Only God’s words have such authority and power.” But they spoke many blasphemies, and they also asked me to go to their leader to confess my sin and repent. They said that if I didn’t do so, I would be cast into hell and be judged. I said firmly, “I have attended the meetings of the Church of Almighty God and seen clearly that your defamation of it is totally groundless. There is no truth in your slander and rumor! If you cannot give proof, it shows that you are all liars, deceivers from Satan. Now the kingdom gospel of Almighty God has spread all over the China mainland, known to every household, and there are several millions of people who have accepted it. But there are also some people who hate the truth, and they have rejected the gospel. Isn’t it because of your disturbance that my youngest sister and I dared not believe in Almighty God anymore in the beginning? Aren’t we both safe and sound now? So you are telling lies and cheating people! Today I am dead set on believing in Almighty God. Don’t try to stop me since you refuse to believe. It is none of your business whether my soul will go to heaven or be cast into hell. Moreover, my fate is controlled by God’s hands, not determined by any man. Don’t come to disturb me anymore.” At that point, my father stood up and threatened me, saying, “If you insist on believing in Almighty God, I will break with you.”

When I heard such cruel words, I felt somewhat hurt, thinking, “You don’t seek or examine the true way, but listen to whatever your leader said. You choose to believe the rumors and lies made up by him rather than to believe me. You brought so many people to disturb and attack me and even said to break with me in front of them.” The more I thought about it, the sadder I felt. At that moment, these words of God came to my mind: “God created this world and brought man, a living being unto which He bestowed life, into it. In turn, man came to have parents and kin and was no longer alone. Ever since man first laid eyes on this material world, he was destined to exist within the ordination of God. It is the breath of life from God that supports each living being throughout his growth into adulthood. During this process, none believes that he lives and grows up under the care of God. Rather, man holds that he grows up under the love and care of his parents, and that his growth is governed by the instinct of life. This is because man knows not who bestowed life or from whence it came, much less how the instinct of life creates miracles” (“God Is the Source of Man’s Life” in The Word Appears in the Flesh). These words of God made me understand: Although my flesh was born of my parents, my life came from God. Had God not bestowed life upon me, my flesh would be an entity of corruption and a walking corpse. It is because of the care and keeping of God that I have survived until today; without God’s care and keeping, I would have long been devoured by Satan. Today I should repay God, not my parents. Although I have a physical relationship with my parents, we are incompatible in the spirit, for their essence is one of resistance to God. I should not join in their opposition to God, but should stand on God’s side. Even if my father disowns me, I should follow God to the end and stand firm in my testimony to God. So I said to my father, “Dad, in belief in God, I must obey God rather than man, and I can’t act by my emotion. If what you say corresponds to the truth and God’s will, I will obey you; if you want me to betray God, that’s impossible!” When they saw I was so determined, they shook their heads and stood up, and went away in dejection. Seeing the sorry figure they cut, I could not but shout for joy in my heart, “O God, You are so almighty! It is Your words that have given me the faith and courage to shame and defeat Satan thoroughly.”

Though the people in religion stopped coming to disturb me, my parents, instigated by their leader, often came to my home to persuade me, insisting that I should go to their leader and repent before him. One day, they came again. They attempted to mislead me with some Bible verses but failed. And then my mother wept uncontrollably, beseeching me to quickly go to their leader and repent before him. Looking at her tearful face, I felt distressed in my heart. “She lost her mother when she was three. Her stepmother ill-treated her, and she suffered a lot. Now she is getting old, but, instead of fulfilling my filial duty to her, I made her worry so much about me.” Thinking of this, I turned to my father and saw him looking at me with expectant eyes. My heart ached, and tears welled up in my eyes. But at that moment, these words of God occurred to my mind: “In every step of work that God does within people, externally it appears to be interactions between people, as if born of human arrangements, or from human interference. But behind the scenes, every step of work, and everything that happens, is a wager made by Satan before God, and requires people to stand firm in their testimony to God. Take when Job was tried, for example: Behind the scenes, Satan was making a bet with God, and what happened to Job was the deeds of men, and the interference of men. Behind every step that God does in you is Satan’s wager with God—behind it all is a battle” (“Only Loving God Is Truly Believing in God” in The Word Appears in the Flesh). God’s words made me realize that on the surface I was confronted with my parents’ interference, but behind that was Satan’s wager with God in the spiritual realm: Satan attempted to deceive me using my emotions, to make me take pity on my parents, stand on their side, and obey them and thus deny and betray God. I must see through Satan’s trick, and should not grieve or disappoint God. I must stand on God’s side firmly and never betray God. So regardless of what they said and how hard they tried to persuade me, my heart remained unshaken. They had no choice but to leave in low spirits.

Afterward, as I didn’t go to my former leader to repent, he asked my father to announce to all the believers that I was expelled from the church, and he also told my parents to draw a clear line with me. Because of the interference of my former leader and my parents, my husband began to persecute me frenziedly. Every time after I came back home from performing my duty, he would curse or beat me, shut me out of the house, or break my electric scooter or my bicycle. Once he even sent me to the local police station. I was worn out and pined away with such tortures from him. The people of our village also ridiculed and slandered me. Faced with such adverse environments, I felt very weak within, thinking that believing in God was too difficult. I was at a loss how to walk the way ahead. Many a time I knelt down before God and prayed tearfully to ask Him to give me faith and strength.

Later, I saw these words of God: “The ‘overcomers’ that God speaks of are those, who, under the siege and influence of Satan, that is, under the forces of darkness, still stand witness and maintain their original faith and their loyalty to God. Regardless of anything else, your chaste heart remains steadfast before God, and your true love of God stays unchanging. This means that you stand witness before God, and you are the ‘overcomer’ of which God speaks. When God blesses you, you pursue well. When God does not bless you, you draw back. Is this chastity? Since you are certain this is the true way, you should walk to the end and keep your loyalty to God. Since you see that God has come to earth to personally perfect you, you should give your heart to Him completely. No matter what God does—He may give you a bad outcome in the end—you can still follow Him. This means that you have kept your chastity before God” (“You Ought to Maintain Your Devotion to God” in The Word Appears in the Flesh).

From God’s words, I came to understand: In the last days, God will make a group of overcomers, and His followers therefore have to undergo many temptations both great and small from Satan. They have to actually experience the persecution from the CCP, the disturbance of the religious world, the rejection of their relatives, and the ridicule and insults of the worldly people. Those who can obey God and be faithful to God and do not betray God in any environment, who can stand firm in his testimony to God, will be the overcomers made by God. They will also be the ones who will receive God’s promises and survive the great disasters. Today God has arranged such environments in order to make me perfect and to see whether I will have a complaining heart, whether I have faith in God, and whether I am one who truly believes and obeys God. After I was clear about God’s will, I made a resolution before God: No matter what persecution or tribulation I may encounter, I will fulfill the duty of a creature to satisfy God. Although Satan frantically hindered and disturbed me, in an attempt to force me to deny and betray God, I prayed and looked to God at every time and equipped myself with God’s words every day. So God opened up a way out for me, which allowed me to see God’s almightiness and wondrous deeds. The more my husband persecuted me, the more God disciplined him. Later he didn’t dare to beat me or break my bike anymore. So my faith in God became greater.

One year later, I went to my youngest sister’s company with Sister Zhang to preach God’s work of the last days to her again, and she accepted it. When I saw her accepting the book of God’s word with both hands, I thought, “It is really difficult for God to save man!” At that moment, my tears streamed down my face uncontrollably, and I kept giving thanks and praises to God in my heart. In 2006, my youngest sister and I went to my younger sister to preach the gospel to her, and she also accepted it. After that, we brought several other relatives of ours to Almighty God as well. This allowed me to see that no matter how desperately the religious leaders try to hinder God’s work, it is to no avail. No force of Satan can halt God’s footsteps, and all God’s sheep will surely recognize His voice and return to Him. Just as Almighty God says: “The kingdom is expanding in humanity’s midst, it is forming in humanity’s midst, it is standing up in humanity’s midst; there is no force that can destroy My kingdom” (“The Nineteenth Utterance” of God’s Utterances to the Entire Universe in The Word Appears in the Flesh).

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Breaking Out of the Cocoon I

Fangfang

My whole family believed in the Lord in the Head Covering Church. I was an ordinary believer, and my father was a junior leader. In February 2004, I accepted Almighty God’s work of the last days, and then I took Sister Zhang of the Church of Almighty God to preach the kingdom gospel to my youngest sister. I had planned to preach it to my father after I equipped myself with enough words of God. But unexpectedly, he soon learned that I had accepted the kingdom gospel, and started to disturb me frantically.

One late afternoon, my father rushed to my house and said to me angrily, “I never expected that you would believe in the Eastern Lightning. You’ve taken the wrong way. … Go to the church quickly and repent before the leader, and ask the Lord Jesus to forgive your sin.” I said, “Dad, I’m not on the wrong way. I have read many of Almighty God’s words and recognized they are truly God’s voice. Almighty God is exactly the returned Lord Jesus. The Age of Grace has passed. Now is the Age of Kingdom, and God has come to do new work. Doesn’t the Bible say, ‘These are they which follow the Lamb wherever he goes’ (Revelation 14:4)? I have kept pace with the Lord’s footsteps….” Whatever I said, however, my father just wouldn’t listen. He insisted on me going to the leader to explain myself, and my husband stood beside him stoking the tension. I thought to myself, “It seems that my father won’t be satisfied until I go to the church.” I prayed in my heart, asking God to protect me. Then my husband drove me together with my father to a meeting place on his instructions. About sixty or seventy people were there, including my youngest sister, who was brought there by her mother-in-law. A senior leader came to my sister and me, spoke many blasphemies against Almighty God and slandered His Church. His words, so horrible, hit me like a ton of bricks and sent a chill down my spine. I got confused and thought, “I haven’t attended meetings for a few years, and I’m certainly ill-informed. Since the leader is a servant of the Lord who shepherds the church, he is unlikely to cheat us. Have I really been deceived?” Finally, my father and my sister’s mother-in-law forced my sister and me to close our eyes and asked the leader to pray for the Lord Jesus to forgive our sin. While the leader was praying, my sister and I didn’t pray and remained silent. …

After I returned home that evening, I considered the words of the leader and recalled the days of my contact with Sister Zhang, who was not at all like what the leader said. I also turned over the words of Almighty God in my mind, feeling that they indeed couldn’t be spoken by man. The positive and negative thoughts kept recurring to me, and I tossed and turned in bed, unable to fall asleep. When I got up next morning, I felt dazed and distressed. I didn’t feel like eating breakfast and had no heart to do anything. Owing to my poor sleep the night before, I got into bed after lunch, and my youngest sister came when I had just lain down. She said, “We’ve been deceived. We are believing in a wrong way. So just back out.” I said, “I have read through The Scroll Opened by the Lamb several times. The word of Almighty God is indeed God’s voice, and Almighty God is really the Lord Jesus we’ve been yearning for. I don’t think we are on the wrong path.” Then my sister left as she couldn’t persuade me. I thought, “It is absolutely true that Almighty God is the returned Lord Jesus. But what explains those things the leader said about the Eastern Lightning?” While I was thinking of this, my husband told me that my father called and asked me to go to meet him at once. I knew he would interfere with me again, so I didn’t want to go, but my husband pushed me into his car forcefully. When I got to my parents’ home, I found my youngest sister and her mother-in-law were also there. Upon seeing me, my father said sulkily, “… Yesterday evening the leader prayed to the Lord Jesus for the forgiveness of your sin, but you haven’t confessed and repented for your own. Today you are invited here to pray and fully repent before the Lord and promise Him that you will no longer believe in Almighty God. Only in this way will the Lord forgive your sin.” I thought to myself, “I’ve kept up with God’s work by accepting Almighty God. What sin have I committed?” I refused to pray and repent. Then my father, my sister’s mother-in-law, and my mother all jumped at me. They also exaggerated those dreadful rumors about the Eastern Lightning and slandered and blasphemed Almighty God. My head was already groggy due to the poor sleep in the night, and their threats left it even more so. I felt tired out, and gradually didn’t know my own mind. I thought, “It seems that if I don’t make a prayer of repentance, they simply won’t give over. Their continuous disturbance is just killing me. Oh! I’d better continue to believe in the Lord Jesus lest I suffer this.” When they saw I still didn’t pray, they assailed me again and even forced my sister and me to close our eyes and pray and repent. Facing their aggressive behavior, I couldn’t restrain my tears any longer. I closed my eyes and prayed to the Lord Jesus in tears, “O Lord Jesus! I know Almighty God is You who have come back, but now I don’t dare to believe in Almighty God. I beg You to pardon me and forgive my sin …” I choked and couldn’t go on. After the prayer, I suddenly felt so weak that I didn’t have any strength or faith within. I said to my sister, “Before I prayed, I still had some strength, but after the prayer, I felt all my strength was gone abruptly, as if the Holy Spirit forsook me. Actually, Almighty God is our longed-for Lord Jesus. We shouldn’t have prayed and repented; that is betraying God.”

Although I had prayed the prayer of repentance, in my heart the struggle never stopped. I thought, “I have read so many words from Almighty God, and I am certain they are the utterances of God and that the Lord Jesus has truly come back. If I reject Almighty God, I will not only miss the salvation but even be condemned by the Lord. But if I insist on believing in Almighty God, the leader and my parents won’t let me go, and I won’t have a peaceful life.” I was also afraid that the rumors my parents and the leader spread about the Eastern Lightning were true. I was terribly upset and in a quandary about what to do, and my head ringing. I really couldn’t bear it and my nerves were almost in shreds. I said to myself, “I might as well return the book of God’s word and the hymn book to Sister Zhang when she comes next time, and then I will be free from such pain and trouble.”

A few days later, Sister Zhang came to water me at my shop. I was nervous, dreading that my husband would see her and tell it to my father. I poured out to her all that had happened to me during those few days, and then quickly took out the book of God’s word and the hymn book from under the goods and gave them to her, saying, “Sister, the disturbance of my parents and husband and the rumors they spread about the Eastern Lightning have torn my hair out and overwhelmed me. It’s better for me to continue my belief in the Lord Jesus. Take away the books, please.” Sister Zhang said to me earnestly, “Sister, each time God carries out His work, the religious leaders use rumors to deceive and control God’s chosen people and oppose God’s work. At that time when the Lord Jesus worked, the Jewish chief priests, the scribes, and the Pharisees used the rumors to deceive people. They said that the Lord Jesus drove out demons by Beelzebub, the prince of the devils, and was a glutton and drunkard. After the Lord Jesus was resurrected, they bought off the soldiers and asked them to spread the word that His body had been stolen by His disciples. Their very purpose was to prevent the Jews from coming before the Lord Jesus. Similarly, today the religious leaders purposely use the rumors to deceive and control people, prevent the believers from receiving God’s salvation, and disturb and impair God’s work. Your parents and husband disturbed you because of the rumors spread by the leader, and they are victims too….” I knew what Sister Zhang said was all true, but I hung back and didn’t dare to keep the books in case my father kicked up turmoil at my home. Seeing me in a dilemma, Sister Zhang gave me a phone number and said, “All right, sister, I’ll take the books away and keep them for you. When you want to read them, call me, and I will bring them back to you right away.” I agreed and walked her to the door. Then my husband came bowling over and pointed at Sister Zhang shouting, “Go away quickly with the books. Never come again, or I won’t be easy on you!” Sister Zhang left with the books reluctantly. Looking at her receding figure, I felt an inexplicable poignancy.

I had imagined that after I returned the books, I could resume my former peaceful life since my father wouldn’t come to disturb me. But, on the contrary, I felt a nameless emptiness inside and didn’t have a clue how to deal with things properly. God’s words and the hymns recurred to me now and then, and the leader’s words and the scenes of my father and others disturbing and besieging me also often flashed in my mind. I struggled in agony, as if I had fallen into an abyss and were unable to climb out of it no matter how hard I tried. I was in a daze all day, my head almost splitting. I had no appetite, slept badly and couldn’t bear the mental stress, so that I wasted away. In agony, I thought of praying. I knelt down and called out to God, “The only true God who created the heavens and earth and all things, I’m suffering terribly in my heart and feel perplexed now. I know Almighty God is the returned Lord Jesus, but my stature is too small, and I am timid and fearful at the thought of my father and others’ disturbance and siege. O God, I am at a crossroads, not knowing what course to take. I ask You to guide and lead me….” During prayer, I unknowingly thought of God’s words: “Do not fear this or that. No matter how many difficulties and dangers there are, you should be stable before Me and not be hindered by anything, letting My will be carried out smoothly. … Remove your fear. I am your rear guard, so who can block the way? Remember! Remember!” (“The Tenth Utterance” in The Word Appears in the Flesh). These words of God gave me strength. “That’s right! With God as my rear guard, what do I have to fear? Since I am certain that this is the true way, I should not be restrained by anyone; I should break through the forces of darkness and follow God unflinchingly.” Thinking of this, I immediately took out Sister Zhang’s phone number from the drawer and called her. She agreed to bring the books to me at a certain place.

After I got the books back, I read God’s words and sang hymns with avidity when my husband was out. The more I read, the more I felt gratified, and the more I sang, the more I felt joyful. I was very happy. My former faith returned to me, and my distress disappeared completely. Three months later, Sister Zhang took me to the meetings of the Church of Almighty God.

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